Dude was breathing crazy heavy under his mask and his eyes kept buggin out like he was gonna have some type of seizure...how'd he even get on this flight?! While I was trippin on dude potentially getting sick on me, there's this screaming child kicking the shit out of my seat directly behind me. Now a crying kid on a plane is old news and can usually be drown out with headphones and a decent volume level...not this little bastard. Think of the worst possible noise you've heard, multiply it by 3 or 4 and add some constant thumping to the middle of your back. You could tell his mother was trying to restrain him and get him to shut up but nothing was working and he finally escaped her clutches and hid UNDER MY SEAT!! He was still screaming and now he'd gotten the attention of all the women working on the plane who were all huddled in the aisle trying to devise a plan to lure him out.
At this time the volume on my iphone is all the way up, homie next to me is trippin even harder dozing off leaning his head towards me and that's when the little demon under my seat chose to make his real move...I felt a hand on my ankle and looked down and the screaming beast was trying to bite on my leg!! I instantly pulled my legs up on the seat and tried taking some flicks of this kid but he pulled his head back under the seat like a turtle retreating to his shell. This must have sparked a genius idea with the planning women bc they came back with multiple candy bars and started dangling them down by the floor saying "choc-o-late? choc-o-late?" He snagged one piece of candy and then his mother finally was able to grab his arm and pull him out where he continued to scream in between stuffing all types of sugar into his mouth.
Did I mention this was all before the plane even took off? WTF!!